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File 137152704577.jpg - (305.35KB , 1440x810 , im dreaming of a wide christmas.jpg )
73109 No. 73109 edit
Because it's time for a new one, again~

(And you can never get enough sunshine!)
Expand all images
>> No. 73111 edit
hikaru no bin go
>> No. 73112 edit
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73112
>>73111
>> No. 73113 edit
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73113
>> No. 73114 edit
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73114
Meanwhile, in Brazil...
>> No. 73115 edit
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73115
meiji 1139
>>73109
> you can never get enough sunshine!
Yeah, it's always more than needed.
>>73114
...
W-well then.

Last edited at 13/06/18(Tue)08:22:23
>> No. 73116 edit
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73116
>>73115
That sprite is pretty cute. Welcome~
>> No. 73117 edit
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73117
An inspection to my old folder made me found some interesting stuff, well gotta go I'm already late.
>> No. 73118 edit
http://www.siliconera.com/2013/06/17/edgeworth-is-chief-prosecutor-in-ace-attorney-dual-destinies-and-more/

phoenix sound gay
>> No. 73119 edit
>>73115
who u
r u pis
>> No. 73120 edit
http://seacats.com/
>> No. 73121 edit
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73121
>>73120

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
>> No. 73122 edit
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73122
>>73119
no
>>73120
Fine too.
>> No. 73123 edit
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73123
Hi, don't think I formerly introduced myself here.

Lurker etc, ok bye.
>> No. 73124 edit
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73124
hello new people
>> No. 73125 edit
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73125
>>73124
>villager
>smaller than megaman

wat
>> No. 73126 edit
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73126
>>73125

I wouldn't want it any other way.
>> No. 73127 edit
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73127
>> No. 73131 edit
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73131
>> No. 73132 edit
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73132
>> No. 73133 edit
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73133
Have a sunshine-filled day, /seacats/~
>> No. 73134 edit
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73134
Greetings to H. N. Elly. Welcome to seacats. I hope you enjoy your stay.
>> No. 73135 edit
workeveryday
>> No. 73136 edit
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73136
>> No. 73137 edit
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73137
>> No. 73138 edit
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73138
>> No. 73139 edit
>>73137
pc game looks cool
>> No. 73140 edit
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73140
It's the first day of summer /seacats/! How are you spending this, err... sunshine filled season?
>> No. 73141 edit
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73141
>>73140
Summer was already here like one month ago, so yeah.
>> No. 73142 edit
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73142
>>73140
As I said once, I'd like to see it less sunny, though. So that's why I don't go outside too much unless there is a wind or a clouds.
>> No. 73143 edit
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73143
I thought someone might get a kick out of this~
>> No. 73144 edit
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73144
>>73140
Spending this wonderful thunder and rain-filled season of not-summer by preparing for oral exams.
Boy what a joy.
>> No. 73145 edit
>>73127
>>73131

lol
>> No. 73146 edit
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73146
>>73141
>>73142
>>73144

You guys are downers~
>> No. 73147 edit
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73147
>> No. 73148 edit
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73148
This cannot possibly be comfortable. Not in the pouring rain.
>> No. 73149 edit
>>73148
eeeeeeew
>> No. 73150 edit
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73150
>>73148
Feels like I'm wearing nothin' at all!
>> No. 73151 edit
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=NeEbtz55XYI#at=46
>> No. 73152 edit
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73152
>questing etc
>been in this zone for like an hour, don't notice anything unusual
>walk up this hill, see this
Whooaaa
>> No. 73153 edit
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73153
>>73146
Oi, oi.
>> No. 73154 edit
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73154
>> No. 73155 edit
I need to share a information to you. It's important. Really important.

My friend atualized his status in Facebook:

Digite isso no chat.

Meu amigo general disse que Força Nacional tá mega bem equipada, pra qualquer emergência


The loosely translation is:

Type this in the chat.

My friend general told me the National Force Army is pretty well armed, to any emergency.


He asked me to type, so I did.

THEN my message was blocked as spam, and I had to confirme my identity.

THEY'RE WATCHING US IN BRAZIL. Facebook is not safety to us anymore, and I fear orkut and other social website aren't safe anymore.

We live in fear: fear of coup d'etat from Dilma Rousseff, from Brazilian's Army, or even among our own people.

There are people here who are so feared, so they wanted to screw ALL before others screw ourselves.

Perhaps I'm overthinking and it's just a bot filter. But once the bot gets me, they CAN watch silenty my account and read everything what I shared and talk before. Not the Facebook Managers, but I fear my OWN GOVERNMENT.

I'm not a revolutionary. But revolutionary or NOT, we are all screwed in Brazil.

PLEASE, SHARE THIS MESSAGE. ASK TO YOUR RELATIVES WHO LIVES OR VISITING BRAZIL TO BACK TO YOUR COUNTRIES NOW!!! THEY'RE LIVES ARE IN BIG, BIG DANGER!

We are doomed, but your relatives and friends MUST NOT share our fate.

We are scared... we are really scared.

From your friend,
Mr. Hercule Poirot

Last edited at 13/06/22(Sat)10:41:16
>> No. 73156 edit
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73156
>>73155
Would I recommend the use of a proxy while you're using the internet?
>> No. 73157 edit
>>73156
Thanks, Anon-kun. Could you recommend to me a safe proxy?
>> No. 73158 edit
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73158
>>73157
Ugh, I can't find the particular one I used to use at work before, but a simple google search will throw you a lot of results. Some of them won't work very well on every site, so give them a try.
>> No. 73159 edit
>>73158
No problem. Thanks anyway, Anon-kun.
>> No. 73160 edit
>>73159
Sounds like things are getting bad over there.
Take care.
>> No. 73161 edit
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73161
I really like this game's aesthetic.
>> No. 73162 edit
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73162
This is the best thing ever.
>> No. 73163 edit
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73163
>> No. 73164 edit
>>73163

looooool
>> No. 73165 edit
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73165
>> No. 73166 edit
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73166
>> No. 73167 edit
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73167
>>73166
hi
>> No. 73168 edit
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73168
>> No. 73169 edit
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73169
>>73168
>> No. 73170 edit
>>73167
hi
>>73168
>>73169
wat
>> No. 73171 edit
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73171
>>73168
>>73169
dat erika is wrong
>> No. 73172 edit
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73172
>> No. 73173 edit
>>73160
Thanks, I will. But I think the ABIN (Brazilian Intelligence Agency) will not try to mess with me, since I'm not organizing protests. Even so, I must fear a possible coup d'etat.

Let me say something about our situation, how it started.

I don't have all the informations, but sometimes looks to me the international press are missing (or hiding?) some details.

It started with the "Movimento Passe Livre" (Free Fare Movement). It was fighting in São Paulo for free fares in mass transit and use of public transport. Our mayor (I live in São Paulo) promised to us in his campaign that he would decreasing the fares.

He increased in 20 cents, as you all must now.

So people started to rage and came to one of the protests of the Free Fare Movement. Those people are so inflammable and non-accostumated with protests, then they hit one policeman, who was working as doorman of the forum.

And suddenly, a massive numbers of protests started to rise in all cities of Brazil.

People were rising empty flags against "corruption", for the "peace", "justice", "animal rights", without any motions who could back or support their claims.

Our police, of course, is poorly equipped and poorly trained to contain dumbs. They started with violence to stop the manifestations.

Of course, many protests were entirely pacific. They were singing "no violence, no violence" to mantain the group completely immerse in pacifism. It didn't work, since our police is dumb too, and police started to transform protests in savage riots.

The politicians tasted fear. They know well if those protests gather to an cohesive and consistent group of solid motions, they will live like politicians in Sweden: cleaning their own clothes, living in kitchenettes and losing their huge profits.

The people remains dumb. That's dangerous. Because if they learned to protest in name of their rights, they don't learned to know exactly what they want. In protests, they were carrying posters from...

-stupid and prejudiced sexism (like the poster: "Dilma, Brazil has no blame if you don't have SEX!!!");

-to the use of HOMOPHOBIA to combat homophobia ("Dilma, you are a dike and we all know that!", say one of the posters);

-localism and sectionalism ("Why there is no protests in North and Northeast of Brazil? It's from there where they elect Brazil's corrupt politicians!", say a stupid in Twitter);

-riches protesting against the poor's rights to vote ("Receive family allowance? No right to vote", says one of the posters);

-violent claims to the national army return with their dictatorship, including vandalism and destruction of public property;

-aggressive and violent from the nonpartisan who punches and kickes anyone who brings a party flag;

-neonazi, fascists who was sleeping with the "giant".

To make it worse, right-wing conservative politicians sends agent provocateur inside of protests to make police fight against them.

Left-wing suppoters makes videos and write texts claiming the people must join a side, theirs or others (right-wing). Of course, their videos and writes distorces truth to makes us all think left-wing politic is the best thing ever since RABU.

Do you wanna know what I think?

Protests are valid, but they need solid, embased claim. And there is no point you go to a "Free Fare Movement protests" to protest against corruption, animal's rights or world peace, since these protest it's about FREE FARE.

There are two factions in the Army. Once they can solve their differences (or to be so alarmed to ignore it), they will screw us all.

The politicians are completely afraid (and they deserve it, since they are douchebags), but they won't surrender their treasured corruption and money. They will do what they always do: to lie, send police to attack protestants and wait people to conform again.

The people doesn't know what they want. If we have EVEN homophobic homossexuals and dictatorship supporters, they will continue to protest, protest... and even when they were heard, their claims without solid basis will fall. Then they will forget the protests and learn who world really works, or, most probably, will riot again until Brazil change itself into their selfish wishes.

The right-wing conservative doesn't changes. Jair Bolsonaro (a factionalist of Army, a possible leader to command them to a coup d'etat) is in a solid position. He is also a homophobic and a dictatorship supporter.

Our Chair of Human Rights is Marco Feliciano, a racist and homophobic person who doesn't know a shit about Bible, but tries to support his stupid positions with it. He is also a Jair Bolsonaro and right-wing conservative politician.

Before the protests, they're trying to change Constitution to make the Churchs able to contest decisions of Brazilian's Supreme Court. It's not exaggeration. The draft legislation exists.

The left-wing supporters are opportunistic. They're trying to fit the empty claims of people against "corruption" and their need of "peace" with their heterodox Marxism's own dreams. They want to usurp nation's claims to their dreams of revolution.

From myself, I believe in a single quote of the fluff book of Days of Fire. If someone played Demon: The Fallen, must know Days of Fire. It's a roleplaying fluff book with Lucifer's prophecies. So he says:

Trust in the faith you find, not in revelations.
Trust in the knowledge you know, not what is merely told.
Trust that what is, and that those who would make it false
Are themselves the false ones.


And that's what I truly think. Brazil must abandon left-wing and right-wing support and create his own government system, who must fits his own social, political and economical needs.

But Brazilian aren't smart enough and they don't have patience or knowledge even to know what they want.

So they will continue to HUEHUEHUE.
>> No. 73174 edit
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73174
>>73173
You know, if Mexico wasn't as distant I think something like that could eventually happen here as well. Fortunately, our corrupt government has a lot of experience keeping the population happy enough not to protest or notice how terrible things are.
>> No. 73175 edit
>>73174
Our corrupt government was experient too to sustain a facade of happiness. Midia was at government side, BUT something changed.

Perhaps it was when the Police shoot some cameraman and journalists with rubber bullets and pepper spray, so the press changed sides to show how terrifying can be his wrath.

Or perhaps it was when Bolsonaro and Feliciano tried to attempt against the secularism of state. No one is happy with them, but the government completely ignores people's will.

Probably these and more factors together.

What scares me truly it is the fact who doesn't make sense a people who was accostumed and ignored everything around them, suddenly tries to attempt regain his rights. If someone is behind this, is he manipulating everything? Or he lost control?

Too many factors and none will give me enlightment to know how to deal with. I need to watch, carefully, and pray to NOT arise some "leader who will unite Brazil under his flag". Is too scary to think if some person could simple fix everything, and not the people united by his own democracy...
>> No. 73176 edit
>>73174

Don't worry, if Mexico's government collapses the US will just come in and set up a puppet state.
>> No. 73177 edit
Can USA do it here, pretty please? :3

---

Serious now. The congressman Fernando Chiarelli reported in 2011 that the Brazilian electoral system of our voting machines is a fraud. And he wasn't the first one.

Others already reported it, but press never said anything about it.

It seems our government is truly illegit and that explains lots of things.

Only now I have this information. That means our representatives are not really our representatives. And that's creepy.
>> No. 73186 edit
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73186
We better finish this project on time, I'm getting pretty tired already.
>> No. 73187 edit
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73187
>> No. 73190 edit
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73190
>> No. 73192 edit
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73192
>> No. 73193 edit
>>73163
wat
>> No. 73202 edit
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73202
>> No. 73203 edit
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73203
hey guise
>> No. 73204 edit
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73204
wut
>> No. 73205 edit
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73205
>> No. 73206 edit
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73206
>>73193
>> No. 73207 edit
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73207
>>73205
>that aspect ratio
>> No. 73208 edit
>>73206
wat
>> No. 73209 edit
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73209
>> No. 73210 edit
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>> No. 73211 edit
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73211
>>73207
>> No. 73214 edit
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73214
>> No. 73215 edit
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73215
ON A COLD WINTER MORNING IN THE TIME BEFORE THE LIGHT
>> No. 73216 edit
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73216
Sup seacats, Redaction is finished. If you haven't bothered I wouldn't watch the videos though, I'm working on an actual VN upload (mostly) that you can use instead. I calculated I can read it about 4x faster than the auto-forward progression I used to record, so in theory that means it's only about as long as an episode and a half of Umineko! Although it's about twice as many words. Please wait warmly for it to come out.

Pic unrelated but mysterious.
>> No. 73217 edit
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73217
>>73216
I might be a little stupid, but as I heard someone else say, your writing style is a little 'thick'; it gives me a headache. I couldn't read long enough to see the mystery.
>> No. 73218 edit
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73218
>>73217
Not like I can write at all, anyway.
>> No. 73219 edit
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73219
>>73218
I'm here~!
>> No. 73220 edit
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73220
Ah, I guess I'm late again.
>> No. 73221 edit
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73221
Remember, the seacats server is Ultros~
>> No. 73222 edit
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73222
>>73216

I'm looking forward to your VN release.
>> No. 73223 edit
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>> No. 73224 edit
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>>73223
>> No. 73225 edit
>>73217
A fair criticism would be that I did write it more like a book than a VN, which can make it a little chunky in that format.

>>73222
And yet you somehow managed to make Andy look even more tsundere than he normally is.
>> No. 73226 edit
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73226
>>73225
Anon's criticism is perfectly fair. And book style has nothing to do with what he is talking about. He is referring to the fact that you use lots of words to cover a point that could be said in way less. Thereby creating a 'thick' style.
>> No. 73227 edit
>>73226
I don't think that's fair at all. I can understand that for certain people it may be difficult to read, but I don't think I belabor points at all except in the case of a few specific characters for whom doing that is entirely the point of their characterization.

I'm not a professional, but I take things as seriously as I can. I've had a couple folks poking and prodding at the whole thing as I went along (although Parts 1 and 2 need numerous revisions, I'd agree), and I've not seen any useful illumination on this issue you've proposed and how it would be fixed if it exists. If you're referring to just the first chapter, I'd point out there's a lot more there than that.

Basically I've never understood your point and still don't. I'm not trying to deflect criticism, I just have no idea what the criticism is.
>> No. 73228 edit
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73228
>>73227
I hope you aren't implying the reason we are saying this is because we can't understand it. Since that is not the case at all.

You belabor points, probably not in your opinion but you do. You spend sometimes a long few sentences on a certain point, when you could get that same point across with probably only 1.

Using such long flowery explanations slows the story's flow. Which can cause the scene/story to drag and feel bogged down.

More words does not equal more impact/emotion. If fact most of the time it is exact opposite. Writers should try to get their story to say the most in the least amount of words. "Concise + precise = better than lines and lines of words." Is a great quote I've seen in writing books and from my writing teachers. Strength in writing is all about making the most of your words.

And then there are times where you just go into completely pointless or irrelevant details.

But I'll end my comments here, and save a full critique for when I read the vn itself.

I may only be talking about segments I've seen in the first chapter. But that is not a defense in anyway.

You seem to have a problem with getting your point across and understanding what points are important and what others should probably be left on the editing floor. As well as weedy words.

http://thewritingmama.blogspot.com/2010/08/what-are-weedy-words.html

http://www.institutechildrenslit.com/ms/WORDS.pdf
>> No. 73229 edit
>>73228
I made a conscious decision in the course of writing to cut down on adverbs as I found I was overusing them. That's certainly valid, but it's also something that was addressed (and would be addressed in a Part 1/2 revision).

The rest, however, is entirely defensible as a stylistic choice. Your point is not that I belabor words (though, having read only one narrator's voice, you have no particular basis to know the difference, obviously); it's that this narrator does so. You also had issues in the past with the report not sounding like a report.

If you're drawing from this that the person writing this section in-story is something of a blowhard who goes on tangents and acts smarter than his writing necessarily suggests... then congratulations on your reading comprehension, because you have exactly captured the essence of this writer's character. That's the way I wanted you to think of him. Which isn't to say that it's the best opening for the work, but that's something I discussed with my editors and they recommended it go there. If I had to do it now, I might move the first part of Part 3 to the beginning as a better hook, but I'm not sure whether or not I want to do that yet.

I don't need to be told about writing concise things that get points across in the fewest possible words. I do that for a living. I went to school to do that. Fiction necessitates differences in voice appropriate to the character. People like Walter and Andromalius are excessive in their word usage (Andromalius's TIP especially is impenetrably dense, and I realize that, because I meant for it to be). People like the Part 3 narrator tend to get their point across more quickly, but also slip personal judgments into narration. If I stuck exclusively to writing guidelines, it would be much harder to represent these characters, their level of education, their attitudes, etc.

I'm also trying to mimic an author who, let's be fair, does a lot of the things you've pointed out. And those are certainly not good things to try to emulate. But I do them far less while emulating the style. I would probably not have written something this complex were it an original concept, but because I had an existing canon to build upon I could try to do that. I don't know that it was successful, but I'd certainly ask your indulgence in checking it out in full. Of course, I'd also recommend you wait for the VN release because I know in the same situation I sure as hell would. Just bear in mind the first VN release will be more or less a port of the initial pass of the script. Unless I put in more work on it than I expected to.
>> No. 73230 edit
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73230
>>73229
>If I had to do it now, I might move the first part of Part 3 to the beginning as a better hook, but I'm not sure whether or not I want to do that yet.
Well, maybe you got a problem with the structure of the beginning of the story then. Whenever your editors recommended it or not, the beginning of a story should make you want to keep reading, not make you wonder if the narrator's essence is the one of a pretentious narcissist. Anyway, that's just my opinion. Good luck with your game, I might try giving it a chance later.
>> No. 73231 edit
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>>73230
To be fair, I am one of the editors he's talking about, and I recommended that scene to go first because I did find that it was effective in catching my interest. But I'm sure you all know from reading my posts on here that using a lot of words is not something I particularly frown upon.

That said, I don't think Renall's writing style is really any more cumbersome than Ryukishi's, and actually flows a lot better for the most part since it's written in its intended language rather than being a translation. Really, I think Ryukishi is much more prone to repeatedly stating his points than Renall is. I do understand why people might not like his style, but honestly, if you could get used to the original Umineko then I think it's worth giving Renall a fair chance too.
>> No. 73232 edit
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I'm not going to take any sides, but my first opinion was that it is formatted like a book rather than a VN. That plus the video style is probably why I never got past part 1.

Once the VN version is ready I'll give it a shot. Although I may end up extracting the text and reading it alone.
>> No. 73233 edit
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>>73231
Well, in my opinion the problem isn't that the sections are too long, but that the extra words don't give the writing any extra value. You know, like in the old Greece where philosophers would use complicated words just to feel superior than the illiterate. Yeah, it feels like that.

About the comparison, well, I don't think so. If you really think Renall's style has a better flow than Ryukishi's I would need you to point why do you think like that. Being no writing expert, but having a little common sense, I just can't see why would you think so.
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